The other me?

It have been a while i didn't post anything here. I have a fever for this several days. Feel so lonely when there is no one who come to take of myself. I was wondering why i not that strong when i was down. Yes i know that im not that strong it just i was pretend to be strong. I need someone but my egotism say no.

When i was taking my bath just now, i take my time to think about this again. It is like deep inside me, there is another me that haven't been release. The another me always saying opposite on what i was thinking. I was born in a good family and thanks God for giving me a good family who always teach me rite thing to do since i was a child. They create my personality now. Deeply i try to release another me, trying to think how he was thinking. Frustration, anger, jealousy and all the bad thing that i cant even imagine come in my mind. These another me, thinking that there is no point to staying in this rotten world . Thinking of suicide can release me from everything. But the me now not agree with that. I was a small creature and unique creation from God do have a aim that haven't been reach. I have made a promise to myself some time before, to reach my ultimate aim (i'll talk about it in next post) . Interestingly, i was driven by that to make my life is more meaningful.

Please pray for me and family. :-) God bless you and me.. amen